“What’s your favourite parenting book?” is a question I so often get asked, and goodness is it a hard question to answer, especially when I’ve read approximately one thousand and seventy two parenting books in my life and career. Often though, I will follow up with this question by wanting to know what the parent is looking for other than just curiosity – what age kid(s) is it for? Are they having certain challenges? What are they hoping to accomplish by reading?
In 2021, prior to becoming a Conscious Parenting Coach, I shared a post about some of my top parenting book suggestions – I still love this post, so feel free to start there. But since becoming Certified in 2022, I’ve read countless more books, and I can’t help but share more, more, more!! I wanted to try answer this question as best as I could by narrowing down my favourite to my top 11, and in no particular order. If you have time to read all 11, great! If you want to select through and see which may work best for you, hopefully my little snippets will help you choose.
As with anything, I don’t personally subscribe to every single detail in every single one of these books – even though these top 11 take me pretty close! So, when you go through, remind yourself to take what works and leave the rest.
Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy
Dr. Becky Kennedy always offers a compassionate approach to parenting, emphasizing that all children (and parents) are fundamentally good inside, even when behaviours may be challenging. This book provides practical tools and strategies to nurture positive connections, manage difficult moments, and promote emotional resilience in both children and caregivers. It covers such a variety of topics, situations, and scenarios, that if you are only planning on reading one book, it really covers the widest spectrum from a very conscious lens.
The Parenting Map by Dr. Shefali
All of Dr. Shefali’s work is about evolving as humans, and therefore, parents. This book focuses on transforming parents from using traditional, control-based approaches to having a conscious, connection-focused parenting relationship. You will need to go into this book with an open heart, stepping away from feelings of shame and guilt, and taking the messages with a grain of salt.
The Myth of Normal [and Hold On to Your Kids] by Dr. Gabor Mate
The Myth of Normal explores how modern society’s focus on achievement and productivity can lead to widespread physical and mental health challenges. He examines trauma, stress, and the mind-body connection in so many areas of life, and although this book is a textbook size, I just adore it, and Dr. Gabor Maté himself. I love that he worked on this book with his son, and how they offer insights into achieving a healthier, more compassionate approach to wellness.
Hold On to Your Kids by Dr. Gordon Neufeld and Dr. Gabor Maté is another book worth sharing, because it delves into the importance of nurturing strong parent-child bonds in a culture where peer influence is increasingly dominant. The book offers guidance on how parents can foster secure attachments to support their children’s emotional resilience and healthy development throughout their childhood and into their teen years.
The Whole-Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.
I’ve blogged about this book so many times, because it really is a great practical book for everyone, especially as a starting point. It offers strategies for parents to nurture their child’s emotional and intellectual development by integrating different parts of the brain, and it talks about the brain in a way that gives us understanding into our children’s development, without overcomplicating it. Through relatable examples, the book shows how understanding and responding to children’s behaviour can lead to calmer, more connected interactions and how our support actually helps children build resilience.
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish [and How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen by Joanna Faber and Julie King]
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk provides practical communication tools for building respectful, effective relationships with children. It uses real-life examples and simple techniques to help parents navigate challenging conversations, encouraging cooperation and fostering emotional connection. Anyone who likes ‘scripts’ and real examples that may occur in their household will love this book. I found it useful even before having my own kids, by using elements in my teaching career.
While How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen is the same kind of feel for kids of the younger years. It again includes examples, scripts, and playful game ideas to handle everyday challenges with empathy and patience. Conscious parenting focuses on how a strong relationship is what encourages cooperation, and this book zones in on the relationship to do exactly that, and in turn, help reduce power struggles.
Peaceful Parents, Happy Siblings by Dr. Laura Markham
You can’t go wrong with Dr. Laura Markham’s books and information. This book provides parents with strategies to reduce sibling rivalry and foster strong, loving relationships between children. The book emphasizes a calm, connected parenting approach, and I love the ways in which it helps siblings build lifelong bonds – a desire many of us likely wish for when giving our children siblings!
The Explosive Child by Ross W. Green, Ph.D.
Especially if you’re in the thick of it with a kid, or kids, I love how this book gives actionable steps, in a way that fully uses a compassionate approach to understanding the reasons for the child’s behaviours. It’s especially great for kids who struggle with frustration and are not very flexible. The collaborative problem-solving techniques will help parents and caregivers address underlying issues, while fostering empathy, communication, and effective solutions, that will actually make a difference, and eliminate a lot of frustration that comes from the adults.
Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff
I’ve shared this book a lot. There are a few touch points, as with many of these books, that I wouldn’t personally practice in my own parenting, however, I love that Doucleff explores parenting wisdom from Indigenous cultures around the world and reveals timeless strategies for raising kind, cooperative, and independent children, through family-oriented approaches. Most of the practical advice you’ll find contrasts with Western parenting norms, and encourages parents to build more relaxed, nurturing connections with their kids – which fits perfectly with the conscious parenting approach that focuses on the relationship and the family as a whole.
The Opposite of Worry by Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D.
For all those parents looking for tools to help children manage anxiety, they will find answers in this book that come from playful, supportive approaches. This book emphasizes understanding children’s fears, using humour (a good laugh always serves everyone), connection, and physical activities to ease anxiety and build emotional resilience. You will likely be increasing your roughhousing after reading this book, and walk away with many practical takeaways to help support your children and their fears.
The Danish Way of Parenting by Jessica Joelle Alexander and Iben Dissing Sandahl
I often say I think I was Danish in another life, or maybe I’m meant to parent in Denmark, so this one has a special place in my heart. This book explores the parenting principles that make Denmark one of the happiest countries in the world. It highlights key practices like play, empathy, and togetherness, and offers parents practical advice to raise confident, resilient, and emotionally-secure children. It’s an easy and heartwarming read.
Raising Securely Attached Kids by Eli Harwood, MA LPC
Healthy attachment, especially with our first caregivers, lays the building blocks for healthy attachment in all future relationships for our kids. This book offers parents practical strategies to nurture that secure, healthy attachment with their children. It focuses on empathy, consistency, and responsive communication, which helps fulfill our conscious parenting goal of raising children who have confidence, resilience, and strong emotional bonds with us. These bonds carry through to future primary relationships our children will hold.
I’m sure I’ll be back in another year, sharing my next top 11 favourites, but you really cannot go wrong with choosing any of these gems! Each of these authors offers a wealth of wisdom to guide you on a meaningful journey of growth and connection with your children. May they inspire you to nurture and cherish these beautiful relationships even more deeply.